Children of the Century
by MochaInTheSun
Summary: She chose the world. And that was all. Pieces of what happened between Joe and Cam from season 1 to season 3. Work in progress. Title taken from 1999 French movie Les enfants du siècle Artwork designed with


**Les enfants du siècle**

 **Children of the Century**

 _Disclaimer:_

All characters belonged to AMC's incredible show "Halt and Catch fire". What I own is my massive love for Joe & Cam.

Title taken from the 1999 movie Les enfants du siècle.

 _Chapter 1:_

 _there was a boy, a very strange, enchanted boy_

i.

 _One – And you open your eyes into mine_

The sex is good.

She couldn't remember the last time it was this good; this thrilling; this hot, not-a-lunch-topic sex like what she was having with him now.

She thought it was wrong– maybe – to have him pinned her against the dirty metal mesh, in the back of this office where she could hear WHAM! echoing from upstairs, but she didn't say no when his hand touched the skin of her inner thigh. He kept his hand there, drawing circles as he drove her mad; burying himself in her.

" _How's your BIOS?"_

" _It's good. Ahh… God…"_ – she bit down on his shoulders to keep herself from moaning too loud.

" _Good? How good?"_ – He kissed her, behind her ear.

" _Good enough for me to quit and start my own company."_

" _Now Cameron Howe…"_ – He looked at her and for a moment she thought he was going to stop. She tried to pull him back in by tugging his hair, but before she could do anything, he resumed.

" _That's not a bad idea - unless I fire you first"_ – He kissed her and she didn't care if he was serious. _"You should be nicer to me…"_

She laughed and bit his lips gently, then kissed him hard.

She didn't know how to play nice. But with him, she might try.

ii.

 _Two – Right before your eyes, I'm breaking_

He didn't know why she wanted to know the truth. What was the truth? A version of events that have happened. He chose what truth he told. Why did she need to have the ones that hurt the most?

But as he was lying there, naked, sweaty, weary from all the bullshit he threw out at life – and what life handed back – he couldn't help but think maybe the truth would make him better.

Days later the storm hit.

And it cleaned him. Blessed him.

He found himself standing in front of her door, all wet and defeated. His heart – thumping so loudly in his chest he thought it might burst. He felt like asking – whom, he didn't know – a million questions. But nothing, nothing came to mind. All words, blurred together, wrapped and tangled and thorny, leaving him there as if he was a kid, waiting for something to happen.

" _Do you have anybody?"_

The rain didn't stop. He could see tiny water drops rolling on the dirty glass window – marching, to a place where they became one. The yellow streetlight shone through her blinds and almost touched the sole of her feet – where he kissed just hours ago.

He let his finger draw lines on her skin and kissed her forehead.

He thought of how he used to be afraid of the storm. He thought of how he was afraid to let go of this façade that he had tried years and years to perfect. He thought of how he had come to trust this woman – this creature that did not belong to time, this lovely body that was built from flesh and blood; that had made him into flesh and blood.

He had her.

iii.

 _Three - Just you and me_

" _Hey, I once read something by Vladimir Nabokov that I absolutely love."_

" _What is it?"_

They were in bed – it seemed that was all that they did these days – with blankets surrounding them, soft pillows that reeked of sex and sweat and tenderness.

" _I think it is all a matter of love; the more you love a memory the stronger and stranger it becomes."_

She grew quiet and moved closer to him, rest her head on his chest and played with the hair she found there, but not looking at him.

" _Is that what Simon is to you?"_

He looked and looked at her. She almost wished she had not said anything – as she felt the answer might break her. Break them.

He kissed her then.

And she knew the answer.

They made love some more – because the night was young and she knew she was in love.

iv.

 _Four – You wear your best apology_

 _I was there to watch you leave_

The moment he said nothing was the moment he lost everything that was ever good about him. About them.

As the elevator door closed, she thought about everything – everything that had been real, tangible, true, fleshed out before her as if they had always been there for her to grab. How funny and cruel life was sometimes. And yet she had thought somehow it would be different. He would be different – because she had loved him.

She loved him.

Cameron went home and cried.

She cried – and in November 1984, at a house in Dallas, Cameron Howe had decided to just be her own person, with her own ideas and everything else would be secondary. She would not let his words soothe her and maim her, and the world would know who she really was.

And yet.

Yet here he was, 6-foot-tall, apologetic, pathetic, and reeked of regret, standing in front of her, begging her, telling her he would throw away the world to be with her. For a moment she wanted it to be true, and they would wrestle in a tangle of bed sheets and love and tears as the world turned into dust.

She chose the world instead. And that was all.

November 1984 was the year Cameron Howe found the reason why Joe Macmillan came into her life. To teach her that she could have the world and it was not because he told her so. It was because she could.

So she packed her bags and in the house she had left behind, the bed where he used to sleep still smelt like him.

 _That's it for Chapter 1, order of events in each part: 1x01 – 1x05, 1x06, 1x07, 1x09 –_

 _1x10._

 _I hope you enjoyed reading just as I had enjoyed writing this._

 _Chapter 2 coming soon_


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